


Stupid Sexy Shizu-Chan!

by Tousled_Sky



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Complete crack, Crack, Gay, Humor, If one could call it "sex", M/M, There is sex in this one, Yikes, oh boy here we go - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2017-05-16
Packaged: 2018-11-01 14:04:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10923330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tousled_Sky/pseuds/Tousled_Sky
Summary: "Something to do...I could "do" Shizu-chan!" Izaya giggled naughtily as he happily skipped into Ikebukkake.





	Stupid Sexy Shizu-Chan!

**Author's Note:**

> Yikes.

Izaya sighed, spinning in his chair. "Oh I'm so bored." He whined. "I already ruined a buncha lives, bossed Namie around and did all my chores for Shiki? What else is there to do?" Suddenly a bright idea pooped into his head!

"Something to do...I could "do" Shizu-chan!" Izaya giggled very NAUGHTILY. Santa wouldn't be bringing him anything but he didn't care, because all he wanted for Christmas was Shizu-chan anyways! And he was about to go get him all by himself ;)

Izaya happily skipped into Ikebukkake. Being in the city always made him so happy! But Izaya being in Ikebuggery made one person VERY MAD...

"IZAYAAAAAAA!" Yelled a certain blond monster as he threw a red vending machine with INCREDIBLE strength at Izaya's head. Izaya easily dodged and laughed "Ha Ha oh Shizu-chan you are such a beast!"

"Shut up you shitty flea!" Growled the ex-bartender. "I lost my job because of you! You should just stay out of Ikebukuro!" Izaya grinned very widely.

"But dear Shizu chan if I stayed out of Ikebukero how could I do this?" He surged forward before Shizuo could react. Shizuo braced himself for a knife stabbing but wait...he wasn't getting stabbed...instead Izaya was...KISSING him? WTF?

"You're KISSING ME? WTF?" Shizuo said very confused and angery, pushing Izaya away. He was also super TURNED ON, and when he realized his RAGING BONER he blooshed super hard (hard just like his dick! ;D). Why did he have a "boner" going..for Izaya? He was supposed to hate the flea, not find him...sexi! "Don't kiss me, b-baka!" Shizuo stuttered.

"Awe but why not, Shizu-chan? It's so fun!" Izaya giggled. Shizu-chan was so funny to observe! Also he was actually pretty sexy! He was tall and blond and hot!

"B-because I hate you! And I'm not a gay!" Shizu said super grumpily. "Now get out of here before I kick your ass!"

"Oh I can think of better things you can do to my ass!" Izaya said winking flirtily at Shizuo. Shizuo blushed even harder as his One-eyed Trowser Snake got harder too. "D-damn, this is seriously bad!" He thought. "I'm not even gay but I'm turned on...over a guy?!" (spoiler alert: he is very gay). Izaya glanced down at Shizuo's BULGING JEANS and got a blush of his own.

"Oh wow it looks like you agree that you could do fun things to my butt huh?" Shizuo sputtered like a lawnmower trying to start but Izaya held a finger to his lips. "Shh Shizu-chan I don't want to hear your stupid voice just s*x me up."

Shizuo blooshed HARD but also his self-control SNAPPED when Izaya said "s*x" and he picked Izaya up and THREW him like a vending machine.

"AHHHHHH!" Izaya yelled as he flu thru the air. He went through a window and landed in....Shizu-chans bed?!

"Shizu-chan where have you taken me?" He asked grumpily to Shizu-chan who flew in the window behind him like Shrek. Shizuo grinned.

"I threw you into my bed...Isn't this where you wanted to be anyways, I-ZA-YA-KUN?" Shizuo growled, leaning in and baring his teeth VERY SEXILY at Izaya. Izaya gluped...Shizuo looked intimidating, with fangs like a LION! But hopefully, like a lion, Shizuo would be a canivore, and..."eat up Izaya's sasuage". The thought made his sasague very STIFF!

Shizuo noticed it and smirked. "Let me help you with that Izaya." He said and pulled down Izaya's pants. Suddenly he was SLUPRING it! It felt so good that Izaya couldn't think - Shizuo's bl*wjob was making him RETARDED!

"AHH! Shizu-chan yes!" Izaya cried as Shizuo ate up his Cream Filled Slim Jim. And then suddenly the slim jim wasn't cream filled anymore...but Shizuo's mouth was ;)

"Yum yum." Shizuo said sexily as he licked up the rest of the f*cktime frosting. Izaya blushed at the site. "Stupid sexy Shizu-chan...don't be such a hentai sempai!" (XD in case you didn't know, hentai sempai means sexy boyfriend in Japanese XD) Shizuo did not pay him any mind and kept being very sexy, sexily climbing on top of him for sex.

"Izaya...can I?" He asked. Izaya nodded.

"Yes! S*x me up, Shizu-chan!" He said. Shizuo blushed and slowly started to put his...awake snake in Izaya's cutey booty. 

"Ah that feels good!" He said. Izaya moaned in agreement, because Shizu-chan was thrusting like a CRAZY person and Izaya's mind was BLANKED OUT! It felt like he was on FIRE and DRIPPING and CRAZY all at the same time! He moaned like it was a p*rn! Shizuo was moaning too, and gave Izaya a h*ckey. The second Izaya felt the h*ickey, he moaned and cummed.

When Izaya cummed, the sight was SUPER HOT. Shiuzo groaned and came at the same time - they were both groaning each others names. 

After they were done, Shizuo looked down at Izaya and kissed him gently, which surprise the flee. Then he pulled back and grinned.

"I still hate you, Izaya-kun." He said, not sounding like he meant it (Spoiler: he didn't mean it). Izaya grinned back. 

"Hate you too, Stupid Sexy Shizu-chan."

**Author's Note:**

> The end! Was that hot or wat? *Squeals like Erika* Read rate review plz


End file.
